Over at Problogger, Darren has come up with a really cool idea. It’s called the 7 Links Challenge (#7links on Twitter), and it goes like this;

Write a post that showcases;

• your first post
• the post your enjoyed writing the most
• a post that had a great discussion
• a post on someone else’s blog that you wish you’d written
• your most helpful post
• a post with a title you are proud of
• a post that you with more people had read

What a great idea! So here we go! It’s on like Donkey Kong!

• My first post is HERE. Wow, is that dry and boring or what? I still feel that way, but I’m sure I could have found a better way to say it.
• The post I really enjoyed writing the most is HERE. Researching and writing out a whole jimmy-whack full of Chuck Norris jokes was a hoot. I was laughing out loud for days!
• A post that had a really great discussion is HERE. I didn’t reach my goal, but I learned a lot from the comments, because they helped me narrow my focus. I’d like to narrow my focus EVEN MORE, so if you want to leave a comment, please do!
• I wish I’d written THIS post. Skellie helped me SO much in getting my blog off the ground. Her post on Flickr images is one that I regularly go back to for hints. Everything Skellie writes is gold. I was very sad to see her move on to other things, but also very happy for her.
• My most helpful post is HERE. Or rather, I assume it was my most helpful post. I don’t know if I was responsible for plumping up Garrett and Chris’ attendance numbers, but I sure hope I was. And it was all for such a worthy cause, how could I not?
• I was particularly proud of THIS title. Any time the word “nerdgasm” gets used, how can you not sit up and take notice?
• I wish more people would read THIS. If more people read it, I’d hear less stories of folks being cheated by slimy computer nerds. Being a computer nerd, I hate it when jerkfaces like that give us a bad name.

So, there you have it! My entry in the 7 Link Challenge. Check each of those out, and let me know what you think in the comments. And don’t hesitate to leave comments on those posts, either. They may not be current, but I’d still love to hear your opinions. Please, tell me your opinions!

Other bloggers, perhaps YOU would like to take the 7 Link Challenge? Link back to this post with your entry, I’d love to read them!

Check out this article by Lynn Terry, over at Clicknewz.

In it, Lynn describes her highs & lows while quitting smoking. She went from 2+ packs a day, to zero, cold turkey.

Lynn’s blog post resonated with me on several levels. What she wrote on balance was particularly relevant to me;

Balance. That’s a tough one. I think everyone struggles with it to some extent. In the process of quitting smoking, I’ve discovered that I’m obsessive to a fault. The reason I can’t just smoke socially, or do anything in moderation really. Also the reason for my success in business, I’m sure. So at the moment I’m putting some serious thought into this (obsessively I’m sure) to figure out a solution. A balance. Between meltdowns, of course. Detox is harsh.

This bit is sticking with me because I also have an obsessive personality. Left to my own devices, I don’t do ANYTHING in moderation. Though I’ve never smoked, I do many other things to excess; I don’t just eat a meal, I continue shoveling until I can’t possibly eat another bite. When I drink, I don’t have a couple of beers, I swill one after another quickly. When I find a new interest or hobby, I don’t lightly return to it once in a while, it consumes my every waking moment until the next one comes along.

Why am I this way? It doesn’t matter. There are several people or circumstances I can point fingers at, but at the end of the day, I’m responsible for dealing with it. The best way to deal with it is to acknowledge that it’s there, and I that I have to keep an eye on myself.

I can’t let myself slide, or it’ll be very difficult to stop. Thankfully, my awesome wife knows when to step in and say “Hey moron, that’s enough for now.” She keeps an eye on me when I forget to police myself.

So, during those times when I have to say “No, you can’t have that” to myself, I go through a LOT of internal conflict. Sometimes I win, sometimes I don’t.  Lynn’s article touches on a lot of similar things.

Lynn’s article is inspiring, and paints a very human picture of the painful process she’s going through. If you want to quit smoking, or know someone who does, go read it. You’ll be glad you did.

Regards,

p.s. In the comments below, tell me the best part about Lynn’s article.

Here’s a short video I just made that shows you how to test your GFCI outlets. Get out the popcorn folks, this one is a nail-biter!

For those who need a direct download link, here you go.

Please use the buttons below to share this post with your friends!

The imbecile that owned our house before us was sent to jail for tax evasion. He was a general contractor in the housing trade. It’s easy to see why he was caught, because the “fixes” he’s done around the house are so ignorant that they border on the obscene. My plumbing is nowhere near code, my electrical system is a joke, and the general construction is…shall we say…interesting. The best part? All those discrepancies will need to be fixed before we can sell.

photo by Dan4th, http://www.flickr.com/photos/dan4th/

My wife often asks me why I choose to fix things around the house that no one will see for years. Why do I obsess more than I should to make it right, when we’re trying to just make it “good enough” to sell and move elsewhere?

Here’s an example why…

About a week ago while working in the yard, I noticed the outside spigot-the place where you attach your garden hose-was leaking. I tried to tighten it down, and that worked a little bit, but not completely. I had other pressing matters, so I forgot about it.

Today, I remembered it, so I went down to the basement to deal with it. We have a “bathroom” in the basement (don’t even get me started), and the outside spigot exits the house on that same wall. From the outside, it comes through the wall and into the “bathroom”, then runs through the side of a vanity (very handy), and disappears into the bathroom wall. It exits the wall in the ceiling, and runs over to the main line that is fed by the city water.

By the way, that comment I made on Facebook recently about not knowing how water gets into my house? LOL jk, I was lying.

As I followed the pipe around my basement today, I discovered that there is no valve between the main line and the outside spigot. It’s a straight shot from city water to my garden hose, other than the leaking spigot.

What does this mean? I can’t shut off the leaking spigot without shutting off water to the entire house, because the ignorant jackass who had the house before me wanted to save $1.17 by not buying a valve and installing it somewhere in the “bathroom”.

If I ever find this stupid loser, I’m going to throttle him with my bare hands until he stops twitching.

I dragged my wrenches outside, and tried to tighten the spigot. It was so decrapitated that it broke off as I gently wrenched it. I think it’s tight enough, but I know I’m on borrowed time. If it’s bad enough to degrade like that, it’s only a matter of time before it just falls apart. Guess what I’m doing this weekend?

So, when Blackie asks me why I’m so AR about making sure it’s done perfectly, instead of just fixing it good enough, stories like this run through my mind (and I got a hundred of ‘em). At least once a month, we find something that just had a band-aid slapped over it-just enough to cover it up-that needs to be completely ripped out and replaced. I curse his name all weekend, and swear that I’m not going to pass this crap on to the next guy.

I don’t want to do to the next homeowner what the previous homeowner did to me.

THAT’S why we fix it right, instead of fix it good enough.

p.s. Leave a comment and tell me one of YOUR home maintenance horror stories! You can leave comments by clicking on the {comment} link below this post.

Oprah is giving away an entire talk show on her new network. I don’t mean time on her show; I mean the winner of the competition will have THEIR OWN TALK SHOW.

Auditions have been pouring in, but no one is even close to the guy below, Zach Anner. It’s easy to see why, he’s effin’ hilarious!

Zach's Oprah Audtion

Go to Oprah’s site and vote for Zach. I would LOVE to see his new show.

for those who need it, here’s a direct download, right click and save

I’ve just had one of those things that thankfully, you’re reading about on my blog, and NOT reading about in today’s newspaper.

So, backstory; I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed by humanity lately, so I’ve started thinking of Sundays as “Solitude Sundays”. I hang out by myself, do things on my own, and generally try to stay away from the family and everyone else. It helps to recharge my batteries.

Yesterday, on Solitude Sunday, I found myself with some extra time, and I didn’t want to go home yet, so I decided to drive down to Park Point and watch the lake.

Park Point is a very long and narrow promontory that runs parallel to Lake Superior. You can drive about half way, and park in the Duluth Airport Authority parking lot.

When I got out there, I jumped out of the truck, and walked out to the beach. It was very nice, and good for my batteries. :)

Then I noticed far down the beach, on the part that you can’t drive on, there was a guy with a dog, and they were playing fetch. I watched them for a while, and then looking past them, noticed a couple of lighthouses. It didn’t occur to me that I could see the lights on the lighthouses because it was approximately 6p, and the shadows were getting a bit long.

“Ya know,” says I, “I’ve walked down there a few times, but I’ve never walked all the way out to the end and back. It’s a nice evening and an easy walk. Why don’t I give it a try?”

And with that, I started walking down the beach. For those playing the home game, please note this as “The Defining Moment Of Dumbassery”.

Well, Park Point is a lot longer than I remembered; approximately 6km out to the end, from the airport. And I’m one of those people who says to himself, “I’m almost there, I can’t quit now!”

This all resulted in me standing out on the furthest pier (with a good arm, you can literally throw a rock and hit Wisconsin Point, IN ANOTHER STATE), at the end of Park Point, at 830p, in the dark.

I had no flashlight, no water, no food, and no way of being rescued that didn’t involve the Coast Guard and a long, embarrassing night. I also had nowhere to sleep, and at least a half-day of missed work if I chose to stay and wait for daylight.

I hadn’t eaten in many hours, and I already worked up a sweat getting out there. My blood sugar was very low, and I didn’t have much energy for walking back.

I was, as they say, effed.

Knowing that I DIDN’T want to end up as tomorrow’s front page fool, I decided to walk out. I gobbled a handful of mints that I had stuck in my jacket (thanks F-baum!), picked up a cool-looking staff that was laying on the ground where I sat, and started hobbling towards my truck.

At first I walked along the beach, because I was afraid of getting lost in the woods. Park Point is criss-crossed with trails, and I didn’t want to make a wrong turn. Soon though, the sand and rocks had me sore and huffing, so I had to sit and rest.

My only other option was the trail through the woods, but that would mean feeling my way along in pitch-black silence. Good thing I had the staff. It helped as I used it like a blind person’s walking cane, preventing me from tripping over trees and getting whacked in the face with branches.

I had to backtrack a few times because I lost the trail, but eventually I saw the lights of the runway for the airport, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

So, I slowly climbed into the truck around 11p I think, and drove home.

I got very lucky on this one. Lesson’s learned?

1. It doesn’t matter if you can see civilization a half-mile away, you can still be lost or injured and in real trouble.
2. If you decide to go off on an adventure, take stock of what you have, and fix anything you’re short on, BEFORE trotting off into the woods. Some food, water, and a flashlight would have made all the difference.
3. Tell someone where you are. I decided against calling Blackie because I was still trying to maintain my “solitude”. Once I figured out I was in trouble, only then did I call. But by then it was too late.

Learn from my mistake people!

Regards,

A few months ago, I began to notice that I was becoming stressed about the littlest things. It seemed that my stress was just never-ending, and it was happening all day long. I started to feel very overwhelmed and smothered.

Prior to today, I’ve tried to come up with how to fix this, and I wasn’t able to really decide on anything. Today though, I’ve decided what I need to do, and I hope everyone can agree with this.

Realizing that my stress is being produced by the things I’ve surrounded myself with, I’ve decided that I’m going to remove all computers and gaming consoles from my life, with the exception of my mobile phone.

I’m going to interact with the internet and other people via my mobile phone only. It’s a big decision to be sure, and I know some folks are going to be confused.

Looking at this from another point of view, I know that this is a big shock to some, as I’ve been interfaced with one or more computers since I was in grade school.

For what it’s worth, it’s certainly a shock to me as well. I can’t even comprehend how this is going to change my life, or how it will effect me.

Oh, I’m well aware it’s going to be a difficult adjustment. I find myself reaching for the mouse or the keyboard completely subconsciously now. My hand just naturally moves towards where the mouse should be.

Obviously, I’ll need everyone’s help and support with this. Social City, Farmville, and Cthulhu all run very slow on my Android phone. They work, but folks will have to patient while I navigate around on the screen. Chatting via Facebook will be pretty slow too. I’m sure the blog posts will slow down a lot also.

Luckily, YOU can also get the benefits of doing something like this. I encourage you join in with me, and declare that you are taking a positive step to reduce your stress and increase your health, by removing all computers and game consoles from your life, and communicating solely by your mobile phone.

Surrounding each other with support, and giving each other help, we can do this. It’s going to be difficult, but I know we’re all strong enough. It’s the right thing to do at this time, and I know I can count on all of you to know where I’m coming from.

photo by StephenMitchell

Have you ever heard of Foursquare? It’s a new social network that’s gained a lot of popularity in a short amount of time. I would guess the reason is because it’s a lot of fun!

I’ve been using it for a couple of weeks now, and I’m having a blast. I’ve also been crowned The Mayor Of Perkins. More on that later.

The fun in Foursquare begins with “check-ins”. A check-in is simply when you tell Foursquare that you’re at a “venue”. For instance, I go to Perkins a lot. When I check-in from Perkins, I’m using the Foursquare application on my phone, and I type that I’m at Perkins.

If you check-in to a certain venue more than anyone else, you’re crowned “The Mayor” of that venue. I’ve been The Mayor Of Perkins for a week or so now!

What’s the point of all this? You can see where your friends have checked in, and they can find you if you’re nearby, and you can compete against them for the most points. Some businesses in larger cities are starting to give “Mayor Specials” for Mayors of their business; for instance, in New York, Starbucks will give a free coffee to The Mayor Of Starbucks. The post a sign right on the front door.

I haven’t seen any Foursquare Mayor benefits in my area of the country yet, but I think that’s just because it’s not that well known. If more people start using Foursquare, maybe we can get something going! I’ve been requesting participation from some of the businesses in my local area.

You get points based on several factors. Your first check-in for the day gives you one point, your second check-in gives you two points, your third check-in gives you 3 points, etc. You also get points if you’re visiting a venue for the first time, or if you’re the first to add a venue to the database. Your points are reset at 11:59 on Sunday night, so anyone can steal the Mayor award from you!

Foursquare also awards “badges” for certain activities. If you check in to the same venue 3 times in a week, you get the “Local” badge. You can get badges for staying out late or frequenting too many karaoke bars, etc. Foursquare is adding badges all the time, and they really like suggestions.

Along with the fun points game, you can also share experiences and help your friends to discover new places using the “Tips” or “To-Dos” for venues. A tip is a recommendation; “Go to Wendy’s and get a Baconator!” A To-Do is sort of a reminder to yourself; “get the Crantini instead of the Daiquiri next time!”

The best part though is when you check-in to a location, Foursquare will try to pop-up a tip that one of your friends have left nearby. You can then follow people who leave good tips, or who’s tastes are similar to yours.

So, as you can see, Foursquare is a lot of fun! It suggests fun things from your friends for you to do and try, and there’s a “live gaming” aspect to it as people check-in to become the Mayor of places, and potentially get some cool stuff from the business.

Check out Foursquare, it’s fun!

Regards,

p.s. I would LOVE to become your friend on Foursquare! That way, we can keep up with each other’s recommendations, and you can try to take Mayorship of Perkins away from me!

Check out this hilarious video brought to you by the good folks at the Google Fiber for the Twin Ports project!

If you haven’t signed up yet and registered your support, NOW is the time. Please do it right away, at this link. Only 3 days remain, so please register.

After you’ve registered, watch this hilarious video!

If you’re behind a corporate firewall, here’s a direct download link.

Regards,

Hoody-frickin’-hoo! I’ve just finished eating the meal I made for the first grilling of the season. Bacon, tuna steak, and sliced carrots.

I love grilling. I don’t know if I’ve made that clear, but I really love it. Living in the frozen tundra of Da Nortland though, I don’t get to grill often enough. Most of the time, it’s just too honking cold outside to stand there flipping burgers.

Today was gorgeous though. I’m sure we’re in the beginning stages of some bizarre global-warming-fueled mega-disaster extinction level event that will culminate in a year and half (stoopid Mayans), but that’s not going to effect me TODAY. I mean, why worry about tomorrow, amirite?

So, I was primed and ready to go when I got home from work tonight. There was thawed animal flesh in the fridge, I still had 2 bags of charcoal from last year, and I was hungry. The universe was trying to tell me something!

Time to get busy! First though, just to make it to the grill, I had to move aside all of the white-trash paraphernalia cluttering up my back porch (plastic tub of root beer bottles, cooler from last year with rotting food in it, canoe paddles, etc). Then I had to go find a snow shovel to scoop all the dead leaves off my porch. “Dang, I really should have cleaned those last year”. Next, the big canoe taking up half the porch had to be moved. Only THEN could I pile the coals on the grill.

I have one of those coal-starter chimney things. The problem is, you need to start it with something easy to light, and then it focuses the flame on the coals, so they start in turn. I only needed a minute to think of using the dried leaves on the porch that I still hadn’t snow-shoveled yet. That’s what 10 years of being a Boy Scout will getcha.

Speaking of my Boy Scout mad skillz… How did the fire starting go? Well, let’s just say it’s a good thing it was so windy today, or I might still not have eaten yet.

Now that I had the fire going, I could concentrate on the rest of the grill. Opening the lid, I was a wee bit grossed out. Some type of shiny, slimy stuff around the edge, dried leaves had blown in, and the removable grill grates were caked with rust. Oh, and I could only find 2 of the 4 grates. I have no idea where the other 2 are. There was about 3 inches of wet ash slop in the bottom of the fire box. *thumbs up* Sounds good! Let’s get to work!

The rust will eventually flake off, right? And the slimy stuff should dry in the heat, right? The dried leaves burned right off, and I’ll get the wet ash slop later. Let’s cook some meat!

Ok, to be honest, I didn’t actually use the rusted grates. Well, I did use them, but I also used my cool Pampered Chef grill basket on top of them, so my food didn’t actually touch the grates.

It felt great being out there, next to a fire, with the smell of the food cooking, and the smoke in the air. This is why I grill. It gives me a chance to just stand there, focus on the fire (I REALLY like fire, did I mention that?), and find my Zen.

The Morning Star had a good time too. Once she figured out we were cooking meat on the porch, she lost her mind and did that run back and forth spazz-out thing she does. Meat and dad, what could be better?

The food turned out great. I dumped it all into a large bowl and just grazed. I sat on my porch and ate some food that I’d just cooked. Nice evening…

Regards,

p.s. In the comments, tell me one of your cool grill stories! Let’s hear ‘em!

…and it felt awesome!

My doc was seeing Blackie today, and he reminded her to remind me that it was a very nice day, and it wasn’t raining, so perhaps I should get some walking in? He drives home via the same route I walk, so he can check up on me.

Honestly, that’s what I like about my doc. I seem to respond much more to the “tough-love” kinda thing, instead of the “hold your hand and make polite hints” type of interaction. So he said that he expected to see me out there, and I did it. That’s why we pay him the big money.

I certainly could use the push. Back in the day, I walked home from work about 3 times per week. It felt really good, and I lost a good bit of weight.

Somewhere along the line though, I fell out of the habit. Isn’t that weird how that happens? It’s really good for us, and we know we should do it, but stuff comes up.

First I wasn’t walking because I had appointments after work, then I wasn’t walking because it might rain, then I wasn’t walking because it might snow. Before you know it, 3 weeks have gone by and then you just forget.

So, it felt great to be back in the saddle. This time around, I have a location-enabled smartphone, so I can track my progress. That’s it in the chart up above.

I look all bad-ass when my distances are expressed in kilometers!

I use Google Tracks on my Android phone. I like Tracks because it will give you a spiffy looking Google map, and also because I can then upload my track stats to Google Docs automatically. Spreadsheets yo!

Regards,

p.s. Do you have any favorite software for tracking your workouts? Lemme know in the comments!

direct download link

Recently I had the pleasure of listening to Lyz Jaakola, an Anishinaabe singer and music teacher from the Fond du Lac Band of Lake Superior Ojibwe.

I was able to take this video, but I must apologize to Ms. Jaakola. The video and sound are of poor quality, as they were done on my phone.

Even accounting for my poor camera, her performance is still striking. She received a standing ovation from the crowd! I can see why she’s won a Nammy (the Native American Music Awards, equivalent to the Grammy).

Ms. Jaakola was a lot of fun to listen to. She told several stories about growing up on Fond du Lac, and the victories and struggles of her life. Folks who live near Fond du Lac will appreciate her songs “Rez Car” and “The Red and White Blues”.

If you get a chance to see Lyz Jaakola perform in person, I highly recommend it. She puts on a great show. Thank you Lyz!

Regards,

Hey everyone, don’t forget that Garrett and Chris are having their Spaghetti Dinner and Silent Auction Fundraiser tomorrow!

The confirmed guest list is HUGE, and getting bigger! When you get there, you’ll see such esteemed local rock stars as; Wulfgar.

In addition, I’m told they have a frightening array of items to bid on in the Silent Auction.

All of this is for a good cause, of course.

So, I’ll see YOU at Mr. D’s Bar and Grill in Duluth (5622 Grand Avenue), starting at 330pm, and running through 630pm.

Regards,

p.s. If you’d like to help out, but can’t make it to the dinner, donations are being taken at any Wells Fargo branch; use “Franks’ Benefit Fund” – account # 5154993520.

Chuck Norris is 70 years old yesterday, and he could still take all of us in a fight. At the same time.

I think I watched just about every one of his movies in my yoot. He was one badass muthatrucka.

Chuck Norris isn’t one year older; the Grim Reaper is one year closer to getting roundhouse kicked in the face.

Here are my 100 favorite Chuck Norris facts. Every single one of these is true.

1. Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
2. A cobra once bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
3. Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.
4. Before science was invented it was once believed that autumn occurred when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked every tree in existence.
5. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris’ PC will crash.
6. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
7. China once bordered the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.
8. Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
9. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
10. Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
11. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
12. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
13. Chuck Norris can make a paraplegic run for his life.
14. Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano
15. Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
16. Chuck Norris can speak braille.
17. Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon
18. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
19. Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
20. Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better do what Chuck Norris says.
21. Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
22. Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can’t get up the courage to tell him.
23. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
24. Chuck Norris doesn’t cheat death. He wins fair and square.
25. Chuck Norris doesn’t need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way.
26. Chuck Norris doesn’t pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.
27. Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
28. Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.
29. Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.
30. Chuck Norris eats the core of an apple first.
31. Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
32. Chuck Norris got a perfect score on his SAT’s, simply by writing Chuck Norris for every answer.
33. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that’s why there are no signs of life there.
34. Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never.
35. Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.
36. Chuck Norris invented water.
37. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, he ate a Jeep.
38. Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
39. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
40. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse… horses are hung like Chuck Norris
41. Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
42. Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
43. Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
44. Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about
45. Chuck Norris isn’t lactose intolerant. He just doesn’t put up with lactose’s shit.
46. Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two"
47. Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.
48. Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".
49. Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
50. Chuck Norris never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
51. Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth’s atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was
52. a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
53. Chuck Norris once bowled a 300. Without a ball. He wasn’t even in a bowling alley.
54. Chuck Norris once broke the land speed record on a bicycle that was missing its chain and the back tire.
55. Chuck Norris once commented, "There are few problems in this world that cannot be solved by a swift roundhouse kick to the face. In fact, there are none."
56. Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
57. Chuck Norris once punched a man in the soul.
58. Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
59. Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
60. Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly ‘get out of jail free’ card.
61. Chuck Norris plays Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver… and wins.
62. Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista on his Etch-a-Sketch.
63. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
64. Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murdered in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
65. Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.
66. Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.
67. Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
68. Crop circles are Chuck Norris’ way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.
69. Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
70. Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
71. Helen Keller’s favorite color is Chuck Norris
72. If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down
73. If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it’s beef.
74. If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.
75. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can’t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
76. If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
77. In 1991, Chuck Norris shot a 14 on an 18 hole golf course, falling short of his personal best by 2 strokes.
78. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
79. In the original pilot for Star Trek Next Generation, Chuck Norris can be seen powering the USS Enterprise warp drive with his roundhouse kicks.
80. M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.
81. Most men are okay with their wives fantasizing about Chuck Norris during sex, because they are doing the same thing.
82. Multiple people have died from Chuck Norris giving them the finger.
83. On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
84. One time while sparring with Wolverine, Chuck Norris accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its technical term: Jupiter.
85. Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.
86. Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.
87. Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
88. Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren’t the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
89. Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
90. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
91. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably
92. The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
93. The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
94. The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’ fist.
95. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
96. There is no such thing as tornadoes Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
97. When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the earth down.
98. When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
99. When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he’s telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
100. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Regards,

p.s. What are your favorite Chuck Norris facts? I’d love to hear them in the comments!

photo by raggster

It’s taken me a long time to learn some of the common-sense ideas that most people pick up in kindergarten. I was reminded recently of the wisdom in the idea “Use the right tool for the job.”

A customer contacted me and asked me to look at a heavily-modified spreadsheet. Up front, I have to give props to the programmer. It was a piece of art. It pulled in data from different sources, used advanced queries to manipulate and sort, and did quite a bit of complicated filtering and reporting.

The customer wanted to step up to the next level, and tackle some very difficult data from a source that wasn’t friendly towards the methods used in the code. The customer’s programmer wasn’t real sure which direction he should go in order to accomplish the request, so I was called in.

After reviewing everything, and understanding the customer’s request, and the programmer’s methods, I came to the conclusion that I simply couldn’t help the customer.

The problem wasn’t that we didn’t have the skill. The problem was that Excel simply couldn’t represent the data any better than what was already being done. The programmer had extracted every last bit of programming mojo out of the spreadsheet. Excel simply couldn’t represent the data in the multi-dimensional fashion that the customer wanted.

Clearly, the data should have been data based long ago. A database solution would have made the customer’s request a mildly complex query. Instead, a lone programmer resource had devoted several day’s worth of FTE hours towards forcing Excel do the job.

It demonstrated to me that when all you have is a hammer, every problem tends to look like a nail. The customer insisted on Excel, because that’s what she was familiar with. The programmer was focused solely on making it work within the boundaries of the customer’s limited perceptions, instead of what the best tool for the job was.

This lesson in wasted time and jury-rigged solutions has resonated with me since then. I told myself to be aware of the limitations of the tools in my toolbox. When the capabilities of a certain tool are outstripped, it’s time to man-up and tell the customer what needs to happen to protect their data and bring the project in under deadline.

Other lessons? How about telling the customer what’s best for their project, instead of what they want to hear? Or, knowing the capabilities and limitations of your tools? Or, thinking of the goal of the project, instead of the method that the customer thinks they want?

What do you think of this? Do you have a similar experience where the tool being used on the job was clearly not the right one? How would you have handled this differently? Have you ever tried to make a certain tool work, even after the project had clearly outpaced it’s capabilities? Sound off in the comments please!

Regards,

p.s. I REALLY like getting and responding to comments. Please click the {comments} link below this post to leave me some!

photo by casers jean

	I recently visited a Trader Joe’s in Maple Grove, MN, and I’m very impressed. I originally wanted to go because I’ve been told that they’re very friendly towards those of us with alternative eating requirements. When I started to look around though, I discovered a lot more. The product selection is excellent, with several variations of each item. They don’t just carry a
photo by Velo Steve	couple examples of  freeze-dried fruit, they

carry freeze-dried mangoes, and strawberries, and blueberries, and raspberries, and blackberries, and gooseberries. They have many types of cheese. They have many types of soup.

The produce section is phenomenal. It was washed and cleaned and ready to go. It was packaged in both 1-2 people sizes, and also family sizes. We saw packages of 5 apples, for instance. A week’s worth of apples for lunch, I guessed. Blackie thought that the prices were 10-15% less than our local grocery store produce.

The meat section had a really good variety. Lots of versions of sausage, for instance. Lots of versions of fish. Everything looked clean and clearly frozen, instead of the questionable, caked-with-frost meats we can get locally. There was also a sign posted that said if you had any questions regarding allergies, please contact a staff person and they’d be glad to help you shop. That’s going above and beyond.

Most items in the store were under the Trader Joe’s label. One of the cashier’s explained it to us; if Trader Joe’s likes a product, and they want to carry it, Trader Joe’s asks the manufacturers to reformulate their recipes to the Trader Joe’s standard. Their standard for most products is;

• no preservatives
• no MSG
• no partially hydrogenated oil
• no growth hormones in the dairy products
• almost no High Fructose Corn Syrup (HFCS)
• many items gluten-free
• many items vegetarian-friendly

Once the manufacturer has met the standard, Trader Joe’s then repackages the items under their own brand, saving a TON of money in the process.

What kinds of savings can you expect? We saw some items that were 200% lower priced than our local stores, with a much wider variety. We easily made up our gas money for the trip down there. It was well worth the trip.

The cashier further explained that there are no sales, no coupons, and no membership cards. Trader Joe’s does very little advertising, and you can’t purchase from them online. This translates into significantly–and surprisingly–lower prices than we’re used to.

All in all, we were very surprised at the low prices, the selection, the very clean nature of the ingredient lists of the food labels, and the friendly staff.

I will continue to shop at Trader Joe’s, even driving the 2 hours to my closest store.

What are your experiences with Trader Joe’s? Do you like other stores better? Please click the {comments} button below and tell me!

Monthly grocery run, anyone?

Regards,

p.s. You simply MUST check out the Trader Joe’s website. Very fun. Lots of lists for people with food restrictions, lots of information about their products, recipes centered around many of their products, and the coolest looking newsletter I’ve seen in a long time. www.TraderJoes.com

This is, without a doubt, the coolest commercial I’ve ever seen. It’s like a Trojan Horse of AWESOME!

Thanks Li Li!

Regards,

p.s. Do you have any good videos you’d like to point me towards? Let me know by clicking the {comments} button below. If it meets the demanding and exacting standards of The Chronicles Of Wulfgarnia, I can post it for all to see!

Yesterday, I shared my Secret Memory Technique called “peg words”. I use this technique to remember lots of different lists of items.

One of those is the list of items I need to bring with me when I leave the house every morning to go to work. I don’t want to forget my;

1. squirt gun
2. wallet
3. cell phone
4. keyring
5. sunglasses
6. pocketknife and Leatherman tool
7. flashlight
8. ipod
9. access badge for the building I work in
10. my lunch and thermos of tea

Using the method I described yesterday, I’m able to remember that list every day, without fail. I can recall the list any time I want, and verify that I have all that stuff in 20-30 seconds. The only time I forget something is when I don’t run through my list before I sprint out the door!

"Well that’s great for you Wulfgar, but what about when I REALLY need it, like remembering a grocery list that my wife told me over the phone?" Easy! Just use the same method.

Let’s say you were asked to bring home milk, eggs, bread, soda pop, and bananas. There are 5 things on your list, so use the first 5 items on your peg list.

• "One gun". Imagine slowly and menacingly reaching into your pocket to pull out a gun, and…you pull out a banana!
• "Two shoe". You know what the floor of a movie theatre feels like? It’s sticky, from all the pop spilled on it. Your shoes stick to the floor because of the soda pop!
• "Three tree". Look at that tree with all the chickens nesting in it! Chickens don’t live in trees! Wait, I need eggs…
• "Four door". When we open the door to the fridge, what do most of us grab? The milk. See yourself opening the door, and grabbing the milk.
• "Five hive". Hives house bees, and bees make honey, and honey goes on toast, and to make toast you need bread!

And there you have it; you can think of these examples as fast as they’re being told to you on the phone. That’s why you memorize the original 10 peg word list. As you’re chatting with the person giving you the list, keep focusing on each word association until the next one is given to you.

Now you can remember your grocery list. Or your errand list. Or your homework assignments list. Or anything you want! The point is to make it YOUR list, and associate words that mean something to you.

Make them memorable by thinking of funny, or dramatic, or disturbing images, and you’ll remember them as long as you need. All you have to do is replay your peg words, and the mental pictures will come back to you!

p.s. I would LOVE to hear stories about how you are using this technique! Please leave me comments and tell me all about it! You can leave comments by clicking on the {comment} link below this post.

photo by Sashala

Do people say you have a poor memory? Do you have a difficult time remembering things? Do you forget a list of 3 items that was told to you 2 minutes ago? Do you go to the grocery store, and then forget why? Do people say that you have a “poor memory”?
	photo by lapolab

I used to be the same way. I would forget 2-5 item lists almost as soon as they were told to me. Any list over 5 items was hopeless, I thought there was no way I could possibly remember it. I accepted the fact that I had a bad memory, and I would just have to live with it.

I have a GREAT memory now!

Not any more! I’ve found a little trick that’s cured all of that. It’s called “peg words”; and the idea is that you imagine hanging items from your list onto “pegs” that you’ve previously memorized. It’s much easier to use than it is to describe, so keep reading!

I don’t recall where I picked it up, but I’ve been using it for years, and it’s really amazing. It’s also very easy to do. Anyone can do it.

Here’s how you can have a great memory too.

How? You simply memorize the 10 “peg words”, such as the list below. This list is ALL you need. You DON’T need to memorize a separate list each time you want to remember something. Memorize the list below, and it will serve for most situations. You need not memorize anything beyond the peg word list in order to use this technique.

You don’t have to use MY words if you don’t want to, you can use any words you’re comfortable with, as long as the word rhymes with it’s number; GUN rhymes with ONE, SHOE rhymes with TWO, TREE rhymes with THREE, and so on.

The peg word list that I’ve developed is;

1. gun
2. shoe
3. tree
4. door
5. hive
6. sticks
7. heaven
8. gate
9. wine
10. hen

Again, memorize this list one time only. You don’t need a separate list for separate situations.

What good is this list?

How do you use this list? When you want to remember a list of items, spend a couple of minutes visualizing your item as somehow related to your peg word.

Make the visualizations silly, or dramatic, or disgusting, or disturbing. They are easier to remember if you attach humor or controversy to them.

For example; I use #9 to help me to remember my access badge to get into the secured building where I work.

To relate my badge and “9. wine”, I imagine pouring red, sticky wine all over my badge and the table it’s resting on, really making a mess of the white tablecloth.

Now that image is burned into my brain, because it’s so dramatic and silly.

Here’s an example.

How can we use these words to keep from forgetting a list? I’m glad you asked!

Let’s take an example. One of the ways I use the list is to remember all of the things I need to take with me when I leave the house for work in the morning.

• I start by saying “one gun”. Well, that one’s very obvious, I don’t even need to relate anything to it. I make sure my squirt gun is in my pocket. ;)
• Next, I say “two shoe”. I visualize shoes being made of leather, and my wallet is made of leather. I check my back pocket for my wallet.
• “Three tree” gives me an image of a tree, with a giant cell phone as the trunk. The tree is using it’s branches to dial a number on itself. A very silly image, but it reminds me to check my pocket for my cell phone.
• Then I say “four door”. Doors are opened with keys. Is my keyring in my pocket?
• After that is “five hive”. I see an image of a beehive, bursting at the seams with honey. As the sun shines on the honey, the reflection becomes so bright, I need to wear sunglasses. I make sure my sunglasses are packed in my murse.
• “Six sticks”. Sticks can be tools. I need tools to get through my day. Is my pocket knife in my pocket, and my Leatherman tool in my bag?
• Next comes “seven Heaven”. I envision a single ray of light bursting through the clouds from Heaven. That ray of light reminds me to check my bag for my flashlight.
• After that is “eight gate”. I think of my ipod as a gate to peace, when I’m feeling stressed. I put my iPod into my bag.
• Then comes “nine wine”. I’ve already told you that one! Is my access badge on my belt? If not, I’d better run and find it.
• Finally, I say “ten hen”. I see a mother hen running after me, nagging me to not forget my lunch, and my Thermos of tea. If they’re not in my bag, I grab them from the fridge.

I NEVER forget any of this stuff anymore!

And that’s it! The entire list takes me 20-30 seconds to run through in my head, but it ensures that I never forget anything I need to start my day.

Tomorrow, I’ll show you how you can use this same technique to memorize ANY list of 10 or less items. No more forgotten grocery lists!

p.s. I would LOVE to hear your methods of remembering lists like this. Please leave me a comment by clicking on the {comments} link below this post.

Fans of The Guild!

Check it out! Codex, from The Guild, is auctioning off her staff for donations to the Red Cross to help Haiti!

	Did you know that you can link to your friends or fan pages in Facebook when you’re writing a status message? Simply enter an “@” symbol, and then begin typing the name of the person you’d like to link to, like so;

Facebook will autocomplete the name based on what you typed.

Finish the status message, and it turns in to a clickable link!

How cool is that?!?

Give it a try! Link to your friends, ‘cause that’s what this crazy technology is all about.

Regards,

p.s. Do you have any cool Facebook tricks you’d like to share? How about anything you’ve seen but don’t know how to do? Share ‘em in the comments, and I’ll show you!

photo by Bern@t

I’ve posted 50 times, and I’m just getting started

This is my 50th blog post! Woo hoo! I thought I’d “pull back the curtain” for a bit, and use this occasion to give folks some behind-the-scenes thoughts.

I’m very proud of getting to 50 posts. It’s taken a lot of work, and a good bit if discipline, and several late nights when I really wanted to go to bed.

Looking back, it was certainly worth it to me. I’ve blogged every day for the past 39 days (I had 11 posts in my blog already before I started going every day).

Now that may not seem like a lot, but it’s enough to ingrain the habit into my head, and that was the whole point.

This blog was started with no plan, really

I really didn’t have anything in particular on my mind when I started, I only knew that I wanted to become a blogger. I decided one day that I had to train myself to think as a blogger, so I set a goal of blogging daily for 100 days. My only purpose was to write every day.

I’m almost half way there, and it looks like I’m well on my way. Blogging every day has already become a habit, and from here on out, it will only get stronger. Going forward, I may not post every day, but I will certainly write every day.

The blogging bug has bit me, and I want to make this blog useful

I’m really enjoying writing every day. It’s a way for me to stretch my brain and give it a bit of a work out. And, it’s just plain fun! I like writing posts that are read by other people. I’m getting a real kick out of it.

I want to improve my blog though, and make it more useful. I’d like more people, giving me a wider range of posting topics, and a broader range of comments.

I’m going to be experimenting in the next several weeks with methods of gaining additional readers, and optimizing my blog. One of my plans is to perhaps adjust my posting frequency. Again, I’ll write every day, but I’m thinking I may only post Monday thru Friday. What do you think? Please leave me a comment.

This blog’s focus hasn’t always been very solid

I’ve touched a bit on the focus of my blog in previous posts. I’ve taken a shotgun approach to topics on this blog. Some folks have told me to just write what I want, others have told me to that the blog’s focus should be on me, and therefore a broad topic that isn’t easily categorized. Both of these ideas are wise, and very good.

To improve my writing though, I’m still wanting to get a bit more specific in my focus. I’m not totally sure where I’m going with that yet, but I have some ideas I’d like to work on.

I’d really like to explore how to help people solve their problems

One of the things I enjoy most is figuring things out. I’ve been told for years that I naturally fall into a teacher role when I’m solving problems for others.

I’m going to see where my blog takes me along those lines. The internet is a big, scary, confusing place. It’s filled with tons of crap, and a few gems. I want to help people navigate through the chaos, and solve their own problems. My blog is going to help me do that.

There are big plans in the future for TCOW

I’ll make several changes in the near future. All of them will be with the goal of improving my blog, and helping my people.

Recently, I’ve created a Facebook group centered on The Chronicles Of Wulfgarnia. It will be open very soon, after I clear out a few lingering bugs.

People have asked about behind-the-scenes topics like this post. They’ve also asked me to perhaps go into greater detail on some of my posts. To address both of those ideas, I’m going to experiment with a video newsletter, perhaps once a month, perhaps once a week. It will be separate from the daily posts, but will also enhance them. I’ll experiment with it and see what people like.

Another item that people have asked for is themed-guides on a specific topic. Like my recent post about virus hoaxes, but in greater detail. I’m looking into just how I can get that moving as well. Look for those to be coming soon.

You can help

I need problems to solve. I need questions, and comments, and suggestions for issues to cover. And I need them from you! Please comment!

I’ve been doing technology for so long, I very wrongfully assume that some things are just basic knowledge. Folks need help with some things though, and so I don’t know what I don’t know. I hope that didn’t sound too conceited!

What are some of the things that you’d like to know more about? What things would you like to see me write about and explain? No subject is too simple, or too small. If you’d rather not comment, feel free to email me directly, and I’ll state the question generically when I answer it.

I’m excited about the future of The Chronicles Of Wulfgarnia

I’m really becoming fond of my blog! I want to continue writing as much as I can. And I’m looking forward to the interaction and discussions with my readers.

So, let’s get started!

Regards,

	I like to figure stuff out. I mean, I REALLY LIKE to figure stuff out. I think it’s the thrill of the hunt, ya know? I know the solution is out there somewhere. If I can just piece together
photo by Mrs Logic	enough clues, if I can just get a push in

the right direction, if I just get the first step, I can usually make the rest of it fall into place.

I’m not saying this to brag, this is just the way it usually happens for me. That first step, though, is usually the most elusive. So, I’ve developed a toolbox of places that I return to, time and again, to get answers.

These places are where I’ve found the most correct solutions to problems. I can be assured that when I have something to figure out, most of the time, these URLs provide a very handy jumping off point.

I’d like to share them with YOU, so maybe you can get some similar results with them.

Snopes.com

People come to me with questions about virii and hoaxes all the time. When I suspect that something is a hoax, my first stop is Snopes. Usually, all it takes is grabbing some text from the hoax email, and plugging it into Snope’s search engine.

Even better, they track issues that people have claimed are hoaxes, but instead turn out to be real issues. This helps prevent false positives, and tells me I need to do some further digging.

Chip Pearson’s page

I also get a lot of Excel questions, as I know a good bit about it. When ever I have a doozy, I head straight to Chip Pearson’s page. The level of knowledge there is second-to-none.

One of the best part’s about Chip’s page is that he gives solutions for both formulae, and also VBA. I like having that flexibility when I need to implement a solution.

Also, lots of problems are broken up into specific pages covering a narrow topic. That way, you don’t have to comb through question forums and hope you hit on the correct search term. A premium website filled with good stuff.

MakeUseOf

If my question is a bit broader, or I need more of a workaround instead of a solution, I almost always go to MakeUseOf.com. They have several writers at that site, and they cover a broad range of topics that pertain to software or hardware use. Typing a keyword or two into their search engine will almost always give me some good results.

Another cool thing about MakeUseOf is that you can just browse the articles. I often find solutions for problems I don’t even know I have. Their information is always of the highest quality, and they do their homework. An awesome site.

Instructables

Sometimes, I like to get all DIY up in here. And there’s no better place for Do-It-Yourself-ers than Instructables.com. Their information is project-based, and comes straight from the hardware hacker side of the internet.

You can often find a unique and home-brewed solution, as long as you approach it with an open mind. My philosophy is “Any landing you walk away from is a good one”, so I really appreciate the creative ways of dealing with things. And if you’re looking for a weekend project, there’s no better place to find one, on any subject you can imagine.

AllFacebook

Finally, when I need to get something done on Facebook, I always visit AllFacebook.com. They often have FB news and updates before anyone else, and they have a wide range of articles that explain many facets of our beloved black-hole-of-free-time. Check ‘em out for the latest Facebook news.

So, those are my go-to sites when I need a solution to a problem. With those 5, I can usually cover most situations that come up.

What are YOUR favorite problem-solving sites?

I’d love to hear the sites that YOU use to solve issues. Give ‘em up, whatta ya got? Don’t be shy if it’s a different topic.

Regards,

p.s. Tomorrow will be my 50TH BLOG POST! Woo hoo! Make sure to stop by for something special!

After the tsunami news today, I thought we all could use some FUN flood video.

This is Buenos Aires. Flood, you betta recognize!!

Regards,

p.s. I’m very grateful that the tsunami that hit HI and CA was extremely low in strength. This is definitely one of those cases where it was better to be safe than sorry.

Here are 5 Facebook games that I keep coming back to, even after I’ve told myself to stop.

They’re a lot of fun, and I think you’ll like them too!

Rippers – This game is based on the Savage Worlds Role Playing game of the same name, and it’s a blast! The missions get progressively harder, and you need to fortify your home base (Lodge) at every opportunity.

Mafia Wars – This is one of the most popular games that I play. Folks spend CRAZY amounts of time in this game. You build your mafia family by working jobs like stealing and assassination. You can purchase different properties to generate wealth, and you purchase many different types of weapons and goodies to help you in your missions.

Vampire Wars – I think it was designed for the Twilight crowd, but it’s still fun. Again, you’re working missions and growing your vampire clan.

Age Of Castles – Very similar to Mafia Wars, but with a fantasy twist. Grow your castle and army by running adventures, and purchasing magic weapons and properties like taverns and smithy’s. The player vs player combat in this game is fun, and you can steal a lot of money from other players too.

Cthulhu: Rise Of The Great Old Ones – A LOT of social networking. Players are very friendly, and talk to each other on forums. Also, this game doesn’t take up as much time as the other games. It actually runs your missions in the background, and then reports the results to you. Same with combat. A very different twist, but a great game.

Check out these games! But be careful, I find that I spend far too much time on them. I have to clear them out and take a break every now and then.

Regards,

p.s. What games are on your short list? I’m always looking for new ones. Let me know in the comments!

photo by Olivander

One of my coworkers sent me an email today, and asked my opinion about the following;

My computer guys (A Plus Computer Service) called me this morning to report an issue with our home basement computer.  Bob (husband) had brought it in to be fixed.  They said we had picked up the newest most dangerous virus and it was going to take quite a bit to fix it.  This type of virus has been around for awhile but this was the newest version of it and it recycles around your computer and you cannot get rid of it and it eventually shuts down your windows system.

He recommended I tell as many people as possible about this new virus.

If at ANYTIME a popup window comes on your screen and says something like” “Warning, you have been infected with 230+ viruses, spyware or Trojans”.  DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING ON YOUR SCREEN!!!  Do NOT try to close the window, do NOT click on anything!!  NOT even the red “X”.  Simply hit the power button and shut off your computer.

If you click on anything in that window it will infect your computer.  Again, DO NOT CLICK ON ANY PART OF THAT “AD WINDOW”

Once computer is shut down or restarted, scan your computer with Malwarbytes and then Microsoft Security Essentials.  Both are free programs.

I honestly thought I had our computers in the house well protected however this new threat is even more sneaky.  My guess is a window popped up and our 9 year old tried to close it out with the “red X”

IS IT A HOAX?

My first thought when I receive items like this, is that it’s a hoax. These things tend to float around, and they feed on hysteria. You may also remember the “pay to use Facebook” hoax? Same thing.

Usually, you can simply take some of the unique text, and paste it into the search engine at Snopes.com or into Google, and there will be something written on it. Most of them are hoaxes.

This particular email though, I couldn’t find anything on it. Believe it or not, NOT finding anything tends to lend a bit of credibility to it.

IT IS A HOAX, BUT IN A DIFFERENT WAY

So, let’s assume it’s not a hoax. Virii like this are called “ransomware”. That means that they take control of your pc, and then demand money to release it. Usually, this takes the form of “Buy our antivirus software for $59.99, and it will remove the virus that’s just attacked you.” True ransomware is rare, though.

Most often, there simply is no virus. The window that pops up looks like an official MS Windows warning window. It looks very official and scary. And that’s how the scammers make their money. They count on uninformed users having a knee-jerk reaction. I know I certainly did the first few times before I figured it out.

IT’S ILLOGICAL

Stop and think for a minute. How could Windows know you have a virus, if you don’t have any antivirus software installed? How could Windows know that you’ve been infected by “230+ viruses, spyware or Trojans”? And if you DO have antivirus software installed (as you should), doesn’t the notification window look different than the scary, dramatic window you see in front of you?

So, we have a logical fallacy there. Windows either can’t know, or if does, it certainly wouldn’t report it like that.

It’s not a Windows warning window, it’s simply a pop-up advertisement made to look like a Windows warning window.

THEY WANT YOU TO PEE YOUR PANTS

Again, the whole point is to get you peeing your pants and pulling out your credit card.

That being said, I do take exception to the first paragraph.

They said we had picked up the newest most dangerous virus and it was going to take quite a bit to fix it.

Really? Quite a bit to fix it, ya say? At the standard hourly rate, ya say? Oh, you’ll give me a deal? Well then, how can I pass that up?

DON’T PAY FOR WHAT YOU CAN DO YOURSELF FOR FREE

It’s another scam folks. If your antivirus software is up-to-date, there is nothing that your local computer geek can do, that the antivirus software CAN’T DO BETTER AND FASTER. In fact, that’s WHY it’s installed.

The AV software can detect, isolate, and neutralize any actual virus code that the paid geek can do, and a hundred times faster and more accurately.

Computer geeks don’t have any kind of specialized knowledge in this area. Take it from me, I’m one of them; an alpha-geek. How would I solve this problem? I would install AV software, and let it do it’s thing.

And that’s all the “technician” is going to do. And you’re going to pay $50 an hour, for 2+hours of work, to have him do something that you can do yourself for free, something that your AV software should have ALREADY done.

Don’t pay for this kind of service folks. It’s like telling your teenager to hire someone to mow your lawn. I hope you can see the parallels between the scary windows message, and the fear-mongering tactics that the “computer guy” is spouting.

It’s the same thing. They’re counting on—and preying on—your emotions and lack of knowledge.

SO WHAT DOES THE CHRONICLES OF WULFGARNIA RECOMMEND?

Install some good AV software; AVG, Clamwin, and ZoneAlarm are all free, and have success rates even better than the paid packages like McAfee. Set your software to automatically update via the internet, and you won’t have any problems like this.

DON’T DO THE POWER BUTTON THING

By the way, hitting the power button as recommended above, while Windows is running, is a sure way to damage your system. This is perhaps where the “shuts down your windows system” symptom comes from. It’s not the virus, it’s the “fix” for the “virus”.

Regards,

p.s. If you need any help with choosing, installing, or using AV software, please contact me.

Heavy metal curling with the Swedish Olympic Curling Team and Swedish heavy metal group Hammerfall.

Regards,

Maybe it’s just because I’m home sick today, but I’ve had a mental hissy fit over my new dietary restrictions. I kid thee not, I was trying to figure out how to get away with driving fast to Perkins, and ordering 3 grilled ham and cheese sandwiches, a mountain of French fries, and a big frosty Coke.
It would have made me so sick…	photo by Ruth Flickr

It would have made me so sick that I wouldn’t be able to get out of bed for a day, and so guilty that I would have considered ending it all by forcing down 6 grilled ham and cheese sandwiches, and telling myself I just didn’t want it bad enough.

“I miss bread so much I could spit”

“I miss bread so much I could spit”. This thought runs through my head about 30 times a day. Then I start thinking about how I’m never going to be able to enjoy bread again. Then I remember that I have to add pizza to that list. Usually, this is the part where I flip out and start frantically looking for a Pizza Hut.

This happened to me when I stopped drinking Mountain Dew

This happened to me when I stopped drinking Mountain Dew several years ago. I was losing my mind, and I would catch myself cheating almost unconsciously. My body was tipping the quarters into the machine or ordering a glass in a restaurant even before I realized what I was doing.

Eventually though, it got better. I got to a place where I could beat the cravings back down, and I wasn’t cheating anymore. Then even later I was able to decline a glass of Mountain Dew when it was offered to me. These days, the thought of drinking a glass of it actually kinda grosses me out. I’ve tried tasting it once or twice just to see, and it tastes fairly bad to me now. The pendulum has swung the other way, and I don’t even really want one any more.

I hope I can get to that same place

I hope I can get to that same place with my current diet. But it’s very difficult, because my new diet is extremely restrictive. I’m not on this special diet for just my weight anymore. I’m now battling for my general health and well being. The stakes are a lot higher, and cheating has much further-reaching implications.

What makes it so difficult is that a lot of the foods that I’ve grown used to, even the ones that I ate regularly as “healthy food”, are now on the no-go list. Common items, like bananas and potatoes and onions and cinnamon and vanilla. And about 30 others.

Eating out is pretty much an exercise in frustration

Eating out is pretty much an exercise in frustration these days. I’ll cover that in a future post. For now let’s just say that waitpersons clench when they see me walking through the door because I’m the customer from Hell who thinks he’s a special little snowflake.

So, I ate my dinner and dreamed about bread and beer. My doc-who’s a genius by the way-tells me that there’s a good chance some of these dietary issues will heal themselves if I’m diligent. There might come a time when I can enjoy a few of the foods that I’m missing right now. I don’t think I want to count on that though.

Perhaps it’s the self-destructive inner-child Wulfgar talking, but I sometimes think I’m doing penance for 40 years of neglecting my body. I’ve had my cake, and ate it too. Many times over.

I want to kick my inner-child’s ass.

Regards,

The Big G wants to make your email socialable with their new product, Google Buzz. It appears that they’re going after their own piece of the Twitter and Facebook pies. Google Buzz isn’t a stand-alone application like Twitter or

Facebook however; it’s attached to your Gmail account by default, via your address book. And that’s the dangerous part.

Our address books contain contacts that we may not want our Buzz updates to go to; that one stranger you dealt with on Craigslist that one time, crazy relatives, even crazier ex-significant others, your landlord, your “serious friends”, your pastor, etc.

Buzz connects to many of our personal places on the web; email addresses, Blogger accounts, or Picasa photo sharing accounts.

Google has released some privacy fixes to address this, but they’re not default. You have to go find and configure them. Google has given you the option to opt-out. Most people won’t know to change the default settings. Instead, Google Buzz should give you the option to opt-in if you choose.

For these reasons, Google Buzz can be dangerous. Please be careful.

Do you have any questions about Google Buzz? Any tips on how to improve it’s use? Please comment!

Regards,

p.s. I use Google Buzz, and will likely continue to do so. It’s still fun, you just need to be aware of the privacy implications!

I want this to be YOUR blog, so please contribute! This is a collaborative community, and you’re giving me your time. I want you to get what you want out of the deal. What is helpful to you? What do you want to see? What do you want to hear me talk about? MAKE IT YOUR BLOG.

I want to know what you want! I’ve set up a poll on the right side of my blog, right over there underneath the red “RSS subscribers” box.

PLEASE fill out my poll by putting a checkmark next to the top 3 things that I’ve written about, and that you’d like to see more of.

If you want to suggest a NEW topic (PLEASE DO!), then leave it the comments of this post, or any other.

Let’s get some poll results going!

Regards,

I haven’t edited them for the good bits yet, but here is the raw footage from today’s Polar Plunge in Duluth!

UHC folks-See if you can pick out the UHC VIPs!

Polar Plunge 2010, video 1

Polar Plunge 2010, video 2

Polar Plunge 2010, video 4

Polar Plunge 2010, video 5

Polar Plunge 2010, video 6

Polar Plunge 2010, video 7

Polar Plunge 2010, video 8

This was a great event, and we raised a TON of money for Special Olympics Minnesota. Thanks to all the folks who donated, you are very much appreciated.

I also want to extend a heartfelt thank-you to Jill and her staff for giving this cause such support. We wouldn’t have had nearly such an amazing response if you hadn’t been behind it. You were great sports, and truly team players. THANK YOU.

Regards,

p.s. These are just the raw videos. I’ll try to stitch them together into some sort of master video, and then post it here.

photo by Lisa Norwood

I went out to eat tonight, and as I was waiting for my table, a couple sat down next to me to wait. The gentleman was being led by a large dog wearing a vest, and sporting a funky handle.

I haven’t seen one in a while, as I don’t think we have many in town. But I realized that this was a service dog.

Service dogs assist people with disabilities. They may help detect seizures, or assist the hard of hearing, or–the most common experience most of us have had with them–help the blind navigate through obstacles. Sometimes they’re called “seeing eye dogs”.

You see them in public places because we now have laws that guarantee access in public places for guide dogs. These laws supersede the health code laws governing restaurants, for example. So, Paris Hilton can’t bring her toy poodle to Applebees, but the gentleman I saw tonight was well within the law by bringing his dog with him.

Unfortunately, some folks don’t know the etiquette regarding service dogs. I saw lots of children petting the dog tonight, as it was a very charismatic-looking dog, and people were naturally drawn to it.

Service dog etiquette has some very good reasons behind it, though. You should never pet, or feed, or whistle to any service dog. It tends to distract them, when they should be focused 100% on their owner. They go through extensive training to develop this focus; watching out for potentially harmful situations that their owner may accidentally become a part of, for example.

By distracting the dog, it takes time to regain it’s focus, and get back on track. This is potentially dangerous for the owner, and very upsetting for the dog.

If in doubt, simply ask permission. Most service dog owners are very proud of their dogs, and will talk about them at length. There’s a very good chance the owner will be happy to give you permission to pet the dog, but it should be the owner’s choice.

Don’t be offended or put-off is the owner declines your request. Service dogs get a lot of attention wherever they go. You’re very likely the 17th person that day to ask about the dog, or ask for permission to pet the dog. I know I would certainly be cranky after a day like that!

A service dog is just as important to a blind person as a wheelchair is to a paraplegic. The dog means mobility, freedom, independence, and confidence in interacting with a chaotic and scary world.

So, please do the dog and it’s owner a favor; don’t pet them, don’t call or whistle to them, don’t stare at them in a restaurant-no matter how pretty the dog is-and be respectful of the owner’s choices about the dog.

Regards,

“                               “. … … *crickets chirping* … … Yeah, we had 3 of 5 as no-shows, so we overheard NOTHING at the gaming table tonight. However, BEFORE gaming, I took this photo, and said to myself, “Eating peas with chopsticks sux, yo…”

Regards,

I read hundreds of blogs. No kidding, literally hundreds. And I like them all for one reason or another, otherwise I wouldn’t read them. There are a handful of blogs, though, that I read just for the fun of it. Because they challenge me, or delight me, or amaze me. Here’s 5 of them. Onward and Awkward-This is the blog of Tina Montney-Harkness, a local blogger in Duluth. She’s gone through some rough times in the past couple of years. Her blog is funny, sad, horrific, witty, and one

photo by kickintheheadcomic

of my favorites.

Zumba Queen’s Blog-My friend Connie is The Zumba Queen! She found Zumba (a form of combined dancing and exercising), and never looked back. She’s currently teaching Zumba classes, and also blogs about her experiences with Weight Watchers, and is a lot of fun to read.

Home On The Range-Brigid’s Home On The Range. “Just a Celt/Viking warrior living out life in the Midwest. With a cast iron cookpan, a black dog, and an ammo can or two.” Brigid makes some of the tastiest-looking food I’ve ever seen. And she shoots guns–a lot. And she’s a sci-fi geek. And she’s a Browncoat. And she’s a patriot. Any description after that would be…well…inadequate. You really just have to experience Brigid.

How Sweet It Is Cakes-Actually not a blog, but a gallery of the coolest looking cakes you’ve ever laid eyes on! My friend Eileen is a master cake decorator, and wandering around her gallery is just fun. I can personally vouch for the DELICIOUSNESS of her cakes. And she’ll deliver in the Duluth/Superior area.

Runs with d6’s-My friend Chewie. He’s a runner, and a swimmer, and a gamer, and a Linux Geek, and an all around cool guy to chat with.

Regards,

p.s. I’m always on the lookout for new blogs on the topics that interest me. Please tell me your favorite blogs in the comments!

This recipe is from Pat Libling, of PatsyPie Gluten-Free Bakery, in Montreal, Canada. PatsyPie’s website is patsypie.com. I found this recipe in the February/March 2010 issue of Living Without.

Clouds of Delight Cookies

Makes 36 cookies

3 egg whites from extra-large eggs

3/4C sugar

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1C semi-sweet chocolate chips

1C toasted coconut

optional-sweetened cocoa, for dusting

1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Line two cookie sheets with parchment paper or use non-stick cookie sheets

2. In a chilled bowl, beat the egg whites until soft peaks begin to form. Slowly add the sugar, a bit at a time. Add salt and then vanilla. Continue to beat mixture until it becomes very stiff, like meringue.

3. Using a spatula, carefully fold in the chocolate chips and coconut.

4. Use a teaspoon to form cookies, placing them on prepared cookie sheets.

5. Bake in preheated oven for approximately 20 to 25 minutes with the oven light on. Keeping oven door closed, watch carefully to make sure cookies don’t overly brown. Cookies are done when they’re slightly golden.

6. Remove from oven and cool on pan. Dust with a little sweetened cocoa, if desired.

Store in an airtight container.

“dang! I’m kinda cold out here in a t-shirt…” I thought to myself. “Well, you’re going to be a lot colder in just a few minutes!” As Blackie and I walked briskly along the Lakewalk with the other Plungers, we came around the corner and my mouth fell open; there had to be 1000 people jammed onto the Lakewalk. There was 20 ambulances, at least 40 police officers, several large tents, and a couple of radio stations. Lots of paramedics,

photo by Special Olympics Minnesota

and several people in red and yellow dry-suits

floating in the water. And a big, jagged hole chopped in the ice on the shore, ringed by a boat dock like my grandfather used to have on the lake.

We hurried down the path, and soon found another group of folks wearing the same shirt that I was. These were the people from my job, and we were all jumping together.

It felt really good being out there with folks from work. We were supporting a great cause, and doing something fun together. I wished that more of us had decided to Plunge!

We gathered for a photo and then were told we could jump at any time. Eeeeehhh! The excitement! I was pretty nervous, ‘cause I wasn’t sure what to expect. I was pretty darn sure it wouldn’t be good though!

We chatted with people in the crowd, and posed for more pictures. I watched the line of people on their way to the lake; people wearing nothing but shorts and sandals, bikinis even. People wearing costumes of chickens and moose, people dressed as bikers or goth girls. It was a lot of fun watching every one!

Finally, we decided to get in line. Mark, Jim, Crystal and I decided we would jump together. I was getting butterflies now. “Ohhhh, this is gonna suck…” I said to myself. We slowly ambled forward in line, watching the jumpers as they popped up out of the water. Their faces looked so surprised!

Finally it was our turn! My stomach fluttered, but I had to put on a brave face, ‘cause 1000 people were watching, including about 100 people that knew me!

We walked out on to the dock, and it bobbed up and down a bit as it floated on the water. We had to move fast, because there were a lot more people left to jump. We held hands, Mark counted 1-2-3! And I launched myself off the dock!

I hit the water and bent my knees to absorb the blow when I hit bottom. It felt just like I thought it would; VERY WET, and VERY COLD. I found my feet, and then stood up. And that’s when it was REALLY COLD! The water wasn’t that bad, but the cold air on wet skin was almost painful!

I lost my breath a little bit due to the cold, and made my way to the ladder so I could climb out on shore. A policeperson offered a hand, and helped to pull me up. I wiped the water out of my eyes, and was amazed at how cold it was as it came off my face. Dang, that was cold!

I followed the crowd up the hill past the Plungers, and towards the changing tent. Blackie threw a towel around me from the sidelines, and I wrapped it around my shoulders. I had survived!

Looking back, it honestly wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. It was cold, don’t get me wrong, but I had built it up into my mind as being very painful. It really wasn’t. Honestly, it wasn’t too bad.

This year, I have the chance to Plunge again. There’s a lot more folks from work this time. One of our executives challenged her folks in a contest, and they all have to jump! The real winners are the Special Olympian’s though, because my company has raised a lot of money this year.

If you want to help us out, there’s still plenty of time. You can pledge at this link. Or, if you prefer, you can hand the money to me at work before Friday at approximately noon. And if you work at the same place I do, this allows you to claim participation in a company-sponsored charity activity. Everyone wins!

Come down to Canal Park on Saturday, February 20th, at around 3pm. We’ll be easy to find, you can’t miss us! Watch me jump in the lake and get REALLY cold. And a lot of my company’s management is jumping also! They’ll be even more fun to watch than me!

Regards,

p.s. That link to pledge is here. It’s for a great cause, and a lot of fun! See you there!

A while back, you may remember that I had a scare with that most-dreaded of MS Windows annoyances, the Blue Screen Of Death, or BSOD. I was pretty shaken up at the time, as I’ve had some history with BSODs; once you’ve seen one, it’s a race to save your computer’s data before Windows completely craps out,
and you end up losing a bunch of stuff and reinstalling the operating	photo by mstyne

operating system. Not only is this a PITA, but there’s also a decent chance that you’re going to lose at least some of your data.

Also, there’s the time lost reinstalling all of your necessary programs, and reconfiguring your browser, and other critical apps. And finally, it’s just nerve-wracking to think that this piece of machinery that you paid 2 weeks salary for could have another nail in it’s coffin. “Will this one be the big one, the un-recoverable one?” You ask yourself.

Obviously, we want to prevent all that. I can’t be independent without staying in touch with the people and happenings that are brought to me by that little pressed aluminum box. I can’t be self-reliant if I don’t know how to protect myself from little hiccups like this.

And how did it come to this? You would think that some of us alpha-geeks have got triple-redundant systems, and backups, and backups of backups, and everything neatly sorted and ready to go at a moments notice, blah blah blah. Well, you’d be wrong. It’s been my experience that computer geeks have some of the worst habits of anyone regarding keeping proper backups. I know I do. I think we think of backups the same way we think about becoming organ donors; everyone says you should do it, but no one really does. It’s time for that to change.

Enter my latest BSOD. After I calmed down, and assessed the situation, I was both relieved and anxious. I felt better knowing that a specific application caused the BSOD, so if I just don’t run that app, I should be fine. But I also felt jumpy, because I realized how close the bullet was that I’d just dodged, and I wasn’t really sure I’d dodged it anyway. BSODs tend to create more BSODs, so it was only a matter of time before they were being caused by something other than that one stoopid app.

I vowed then and there that I would never again be caught flat-footed. I promised I was going to discover the very best system and configuration that modern technology had to offer, because my data and my sanity are worth it. And, it had to fit within my budget, because when I open my wallet, most of the time moths flutter out of it.

This post is a kickoff for my project, a “Case Study”, if you will. I’m going to narrow down my requirements, and figure out what hardware and software will fit the bill. Then I’m going to migrate my current system over to the new configuration. Finally, I’ll outline the steps needed for backing up and saving my critical data, so that I never have to worry about BSODs again, both from a software and a hardware point of view.

And, I’m going to share it with my readers, so you can get a first-hand look at how you can take steps to ensure YOUR OWN safety and security with the computer systems in your life.

Check back with my blog often to make sure you don’t miss a report on this project. And if you have any questions or comments or suggestions on how to do this better, PLEASE leave me some comments.

I’m excited! Let’s get started!

Regards,

p.s. Watch for further posts on this case study as I work my way through the process!

or you might miss this exceptionally short post.

Valentine’s Day, drinking, new meds, very tired, blah, blah, blah.

	I’ve been talking a lot lately about some important concepts, like “independence”, “responsibility”, and “self-reliance”. Those ideas mean a lot to me. They’re markers for thoughts about how I try to live my life,
photo by Stuck In Customs	and how I try to view the

world. A blueprint, if you will, of the ideals that I’m trying to pattern my life after, and what I’d like to see more of in the world.

It occurred to me though that I’m in something of an echo chamber. I say how I think things went, or how they’re going, or how they should be, but I just keep reinforcing my own ideas. This is generally a good idea, because it helps me to solidify them, and ingrain them to my brain.

But, I also recognize that I need different points of view. I need to constant introduction of new ideas, and new ways of looking at things, and new opinions. Without them, I’m going to get stale pretty quick.

So, I’d like you to chime in. Pick something I’ve spoken about, and give me your opinion on it. Tell me why you think the way you do. Ask me some questions, or further the discussion.

When I say “independence”, what comes to your mind? What are some of your experiences with “responsibility”? What questions do you have about “self-reliance”?

Regards,

p.s.

Please! Leave some comments!

photo by Wulfgar

“Ok, your shirt is hurting my eyes.”

 

I like gadgets. I really like gadgets that do what they do very well. I REALLY like gadgets that do what they do really well, and that allow me to be independent, and not DEpendent on the whims of someone else. The Barnes and Noble nook is one such gadget. My wife Blackie bought a nook for me for the holidays this past year, and I’ve quickly fallen in love with it. As you can see in the photo above, it’s very simple, yet very elegant.

photo by Mostly Muppet

The main screen has that amazing e-ink that’s all the rage. You can read it in direct sunlight, and it will still be clear as day. It also has a color interface bar at the bottom where you can flick through your library or pages of your books. It’s cool being able to see your book covers, just like you’re reviewing them on the shelf.

What I like most about the nook though, is the independence it gives me. I can take hundreds of books along with me, in the space of a paperback. I get ebooks off the ‘net for free every day. Barnes and Noble will even give you classic books for free, easily downloadable at home or in their store.

If I like a book, I can get a free sample of it anytime I want. Then, if I decide to buy, it’s just a couple of taps on the screen, and it begins downloading via whatever network is convenient.

I can load my own books into the nook, and I can save all of my books to removable SD card. That’s something that current versions of the Kindle CAN’T DO, by the way. That’s a big advantage in the independence department. I own my books, and I can move them around, even loan them to other nook users, any time I want. I can make backup copies at home, and load any of my scores of ebooks from my home computer.

And finally, the nook runs on Android software. It has similar interfaces and behaviors as my Android phone, so it already feels very comfortable to me. That, and I’m not lining Bill Gates’ pockets every time Microsoft decides it wants to force an upgrade, like with Windows.

If you’re a voracious reader like I am, you’ll like the nook. If you want to be independent of tired, old ereaders, and some moron in a boardroom determining how and when and where you can use the media THAT YOU’VE PURCHASED, you’ll really like the nook.

Regards,

p.s. If you’d like some advice on purchasing a nook, or how I use mine, or how you could use yours, just contact me. I love talking about the nook!

photo by ds4832

I’ve been having a lot of adventures with my diet the past couple of years. And I don’t mean my “celery sticks and Sweatin’ To The Oldies” diet. I mean making positive changes in my eating habits, and how they effect me.

It’s long been suspected that I’m having allergic reactions to something in my diet, so we’ve been removing things, item by item. Most of my peeps at work will recognize this as my constant pissing and moaning about gluten, and how I really miss bread.

So, lately I’ve been chatting with Dr. Jocelyn Zentz, of Veritae Wellness about my food issues. We decided to get a comprehensive test, and the results came back today.

I scored positive for sensitivity to a bunch of different foods, not just gluten. From my layman point of view, I think this is where the allergic reaction symptoms come in. I’ll chat with Jocelyn on Friday to get the official scoop.

So, now we see if I can walk it the way I talk it, and do a major overhaul to my diet AGAIN. My sensitivities were all over the board; brewer’s yeast, baker’s yeast, cinnamon, bananas, kale, onions, potatoes, etc. A lot of the foods that I genuinely love to eat. And they gotta go…

Taking charge of my diet, and taking responsibility for my food choices are the only ways to ensure that I get healthy. Cutting bread and pasta from my diet was hard enough, but now I’ll be testing my determination in new and exciting ways!

I sure do love bananas. *sigh*

photo by stuartpilbrow

I’m not kidding.

Well, I didn’t actually kill the reader ITSELF. I’d have to hack Google to do that. I imagine they’d get a little mad.

No, I deleted the 628 news feeds I had coming into my feed reader. No, I’m not exaggerating. I checked 628 feeds daily.

As you can imagine, it took a good bit of time per day. I checked as much as I could in the morning before work, I checked via my phone when I could afford breaks during the day, and I checked after work the first thing when I got home, and then again before going to bed.

I’m an information junkie. I love hooking my head up to a direct pipe into the internet. It’s a darn good thing we don’t yet have neural interface computers, ‘cause I’d jack in and sit there drooling all day long.

And I didn’t have only geek stuff, either. I had feeds about bento boxes, I had feeds about scenery in Australia, I had feeds about car repair.

Suddenly, I realized that my habit was determining how I spent my day. I was no longer independent, I didn’t have control. I felt genuine angst when I couldn’t bring my “unread” count down to zero.

I heard myself say “Enough already! You’ll never learn it all, so put some moderation in your life!”

I did a “Select All” in Google Reader, and then hit delete.

I still find myself subconsciously clicking over to the Reader from GMail. But when I get there, it shows a blank screen.

So, I ask YOU. Do you have any experience doing something like this? Tell me in the comments. The Reader has been an integral part of my life for several years. Do you have something that’s become that ingrained, that perhaps might give you some freedom and autonomy if you were to drop it?

Please, leave some comments.

photo by quinn.anya

I’ve been DIY’ing for the past several hours, working on my logo and FB Fan Page for The Chronicles Of Wulfgarnia.

Hiring designers and such is sometimes fun, and your blog looks spectacular, but there is a lot of satisfaction and accomplishment in knowing that you did it yourself, relying on no one but you.

So, my FB page will look a bit poo-ish, but I feel good about it!

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, even when we give it our all and do our best, life throws us a curveball.

It’s taken me years to understand that during those times, you show more independence and self-reliance when you allow your friends and family to help you, instead of going it alone.

When you’re self-confident enough to say “I’ve done all I can do, but I have obstacles that I can’t conquer alone,” you show that you are still trying to get the job done, you’re still trying to provide for your family, and that you’re going to see it through, no matter what it takes.

My buddy Garrett and his wife Chris are those types of people. Garrett had some medical problems, and he and Chris are facing some huge medical bills. Garrett used to work with me, and Chris is still employed by the same company I am, so I know how hard these 2 work. I know how independent and capable they are. They see the work through to the end, and get the job done when others have given up.

I can imagine that allowing their friends to put on a Spaghetti Benefit was difficult for them, but they knew it had to be done. They’re going to see it through, and conquer this obstacle. With a little help from their friends, they’ll be stronger for it when it’s over.

I’m attending the benefit dinner, because it’s something I can do to help my friend. To help him get back on his feet and do what needs to be done. I’d love to see you there as well.

The dinner is Saturday, March 13, 2010, from 4p to 6p, at Mr. D’s Bar and Grill. That’s 5622 Grand Avenue, in Duluth, MN.

I’ve blogged about an awesome export from Texas. Here’s a not-so-awesome export from Texas.

	Open Letter To The Couple In The Photo: I understand that “all the kids are doing it” and “what’s the big deal?”, but here’s what I DON’T understand; when you’re working 20 hours this week at McDonald’s and complaining about how no one will give you the
photo by People Of Walmart	chance, and you know you’re better than this,

and why is life so hard, and how are we going to pay for all of this meth that we keep needing, please try to understand what I’m about to tell you.

You are responsible for the circumstances of your life. You have created the situation you’re in. It’s not society, it’s not the economy, it’s not your parents, it’s not your clergy, it’s not because of your gender, it’s not because of your ethnicity, and it’s not because you live in a small town that you have such a shitty life. The responsibility is yours.

People judge you, and make decisions about you, and interact with you based first on what they see. Your appearance colors their perceptions. And then, good or bad, your actions confirm those initial impressions. I know it’s unfair, and we’re told in kindergarten “to not judge a book by it’s cover”, but we do. We do it every day, and it’s not fair, but we still do it. Deal with it.

The single greatest thing you can do to improve your life is TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR CHANGING IT. The way to start doing that is to like yourself enough to dress and act like a responsible person in your community. Like someone who truly cares about who they are and where they’re going and what they’re doing.

Clearly, what you’ve got going on there ain’t it. Now go home, put on some clothes, and get to work.

But…I can’t tell you what it is yet. *sigh*

There’s a lot of work in setting up a Facebook page for this blog, and I want to get it a little bit more spiffy before I debut it. I’ll have it in the next couple of days though. Once it’s done, you can have all TCOW all the time!

TCOW = The Chronicles Of Wulfgarnia

Thanks for being patient with it!

	A darn fine restaurant, THAT’S what it is! Blackie and I ate at The Texas Roadhouse today, and we had a good time!
photo by dmolsen

We were a bit skeptical at first, as there is a huge barrel of peanuts sitting next to the front door, and a bucket of peanuts on every table. As we have a fatal allergy to peanuts, that usually means we need to run out the door.

But, the air was fairly peanut-dust free, so we thought we’d give it a shot. And I’m glad we did!

I had a half-rack of ribs, and then the fried catfish with a sweet potato.

I was really impressed with the ribs. They were real ribs, as in, from a hog. Most places serve the little 2 inch pseudo-rib-but-mostly-fat kinda things. These were huge, and had plenty of meat on them, with the meat tender enough to fall off the bone.

The catfish was a skosh over-fried; a bit too crunchy. But the cool part was there was a ton of it, and it was cornmeal-dusted, instead of breaded (gluten-free).

The sweet potato was also very big. It could have used a couple more minutes in the oven, but that’s only because I like them soft. It was cooked adequately, just not mushy. I also had the option “loading” the sweet potato with a honey and marshmallow sauce, but I declined. I like the taste natural.

Blackie ate the sirloin tips, a garden salad, and also a sweet potato.

The sirloin tips were done exactly as ordered, and very tender. They were also cut into genuinely bite-sized pieces. Nearly all meat, with very little gristle.

The garden salad was mixed greens, all fresh, and it didn’t have the sitting-in-the-fridge-all-day taste. Also, the ranch dressing was homemade.

Our waitress was Randi, and she was awesome. Ask for her when you go in!

Once they started to sweep the floor, a lot of the peanut dust kicked up, so it was time for us to go.

All in all, very good. The music was fairly loud at times, so it’s not really a place for casual conversation. Also, you know how some places do the birthday thing where all the waitstaff come out and clap and cheer? Well, at Texas Roadhouse, they started with a saddle on a sawhorse, and made you get on it. I had to avert my eyes at that point due to my delicate sensibilities.

I recommend Texas Roadhouse to my friends. I’m definitely going back for the ribs, and the steaks looked mighty fine too. If anyone wants to go with me, just let me know!

So, I’m testing out my new gluten-free hamburger buns made from tapioca flour.

I put it in a tupperware box, and snuck it into Culvers. When we got our food, I scraped everything off the Culver’s bun, and plopped it onto my own.

Score one for controlling my own food choices!

Tapioca flour hamburger buns taste like poo, by the way.

Blackie and I visited with our family tonight, and we had a blast! We played Blokus, a very fun game that I’m falling in love with.

Blokus has only 1 rule. Blocks of the same color can only touch at corners, not on flat sides. From this, you get a frustrating array of moves that will take you a long time to master.

The game is simple, and can be taught to children in just a couple of minutes. But the benefits they get out of it are enormous. Spatial relations, geometry, strategy, patience; it has a lot to offer growing minds. It’s not just for kids though, because it’s hard to win!

Blokus is an awesome game for 4 people, and one of my favorites. If you have the means, I highly recommend picking it up.

And when you do, call me over for a game!

photo by kimubert

I love when I can order something not on the menu, and the restaurant tries to accommodate me!

The wife and I ate at Zen House tonight, but I didn’t want any sushi. So, a little yaki-meshi would hit the spot, thinks I. I’m trying to incorporate more fish into my diet, so I asked for “some type of cooked fish” with my yaki-meshi. They surprised me with cooked yellowtail. Yumm!

photo by Claire Sambrook

“I like my chocolate the same way I like my men; dark, strong, and expensive.”

photo by nathangibbs

Sometimes, the regular old “Darn it!” won’t do. Sometimes, you need something a bit stronger than “Arrrgggghhhh!!!”

Sometimes, you need to vocalize a feeling so anguished, so heart-wrenchingly abject, so epically painful, it can only be accomplished on The Dark Side.

Press In Dire Situations

Thanks to Mitch.

It’s true. You can have your Facebook notifications mailed to you, via GMail, for example. Simply set up an account at Nutshell Mail.

After working your way through the prompts, you’ll be asked for your primary email, and to allow Nutshell Mail to access your Facebook account. Once you’ve approved them, you’ll receive a summary email that shows the last 20 updates from your friends! You can set the number of updates to whatever number you feel comfortable with.

This could come in VERY handy for folks who may not be able to access Facebook at work, if they’re behind a corporate firewall, for instance. *wink*wink*nudge*nudge*

	I just had a BSOD, and I’m still shaking. Kinda that feeling when you narrowly miss being in a bad car accident, ya know? My life revolves around my computer. Everything I do for work, everything I do for play, all of my friends, all of my recreation, the time I spend with my wife, my music, my photos, etc. It’s all contained in this little aluminum and plastic box sitting on my desk.
photo by John Carleton	Yes, I know. That’s pathetic and sad Wulfgar. If you’re a geek, you understand. If you’re not…well…you wouldn’t understand.

As smart and as pretty as I am, you’d think I’d be running with backups and redundant systems and safety measures. I’m not.

But, as soon as my heart stops fluttering, I’m going to look all of that stuff up and start building. I’ll post updates here as I go.

I’m going to go lay in bed for a bit to calm down.

Apparently, I’m the only person in the history of Facebook, amongst all 370 million users, that doesn’t play Farmville.

The video is kinda funny though. Enjoy, my overall-wearing friends! And no, I don’t want anyone’s help getting my own Farmville game setup.

We’ve all had it. We’ve all wondered about it. Yet, no one seems able to tell me how to FIX IT!

This morning when I woke up, there it was. On the left. Just sitting all up in there. The one on the right was a little cloggy, but the left was COMPLETELY CEMENTED SHUT. This was anticipated, as I’ve been sick this whole week. I resigned myself to it, and got out of bed to start my day.

Then, when I wasn’t expecting it, sometime between my gluten-free, lemon angel pie, and the battle between Anakin Skywalker and Count Dooku, it happened. SWOOOOOOSH!!! Now it’s the right nostril! Arrggghhh!

Left side, completely unobstructed! You could test a new design for a fighter jet in that newly liberated wind tunnel. We are GO! for 100% air movement!

Just a coincidence says I. No big deal, says I. I’ll just sit here quietly and ride it out. What happened next? You guessed it! As Padme is telling Anakin that Luke and Leia are on the way, SWOOOOOOSH!!! It switched sides again! OMG! WTF!

After that, we were off to the races! Right side, left side, right side, left side. It’s like a tennis match in my nasal cavities! Seriously, is there a gnome with a paint brush sitting in there, tormenting me on purpose?

Medication, I thought! That’s what I need. My dealer at work turned me on to the Dayquil, so I popped a couple of those. They didn’t change anything, but now I feel a bit less scurvy-ish (I bought the Vitamin C enhanced version).

So, now I’m sitting here, worn out from keeping track of which side we’re currently on, and wondering just how the frack did we evolve something THIS ridiculous. What purpose did it serve to our caveperson ancestors? How did THIS particular bodily function prevent us from being eaten by sabretooth tigers?

Anyway, that’s my Saturday. How’s yours?

photo by katiesgirls

I’ve been asking myself this question since I was a kid.

All my life, since I was a early teenager, I’ve tried to answer this question. It’s on my mind  constantly, like eating. No matter what jobs or experiences or successes I’ve had, I haven’t yet found the answer. Nothing seems to be good enough. And that’s the most frustrating thing of all; after 40 years of dragging my ass across the face of this planet, I’m still no closer to my answer.

I have TONS of stuff that I WANT to do.

I’ve experimented with LOTS of ideas. I’ve come up with literally a hundred ideas for things that I like to do. I’ve taken Myers-Briggs. I’ve written my mission statement. I’ve written and re-written my life’s purpose until I cried (a famous way of discovering your “passion”). I’ve explored my 7 spiritual chakras. I’ve talked myself into the 4 Agreements. I’ve attracted my career with The Secret. I’ve read blogs and articles by the thousands. I’ve worked my way through “Discover Your Life’s Purpose”, “Do What You Are, The Money Will Follow” and “What Color Is Your Parachute?” programs. I’ve been Over The Top with Ziglar, and practiced The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People with Covey. I’ve gone on walkabout. I’ve drank myself silly in attempts to force “creative thinking”. I’ve starved myself to force hallucinations. I’ve sat on the couch and played video games for weeks at a time, waiting for destiny to call my name, and my ship to come in.

Each of these methods are fabulous, and did produce results. But not the results I was looking for.

the ideas I’ve come up with seemed silly or unworkable for one reason or another.

That one is fun, but I can’t see myself doing it for a living. This one would be great, but I can’t get paid for it. I’d love to do this, but it would embarrass my wife and friends. I’ll get caught and go to jail if I get good at THAT. No one in their right minds would hire me for this. I’m too old to start over doing that. I don’t have a college degree, so I can’t do this one. I’d never survive the 8 years of college to get that degree.

I finally realized that the ideas aren’t unworkable, I am.

A lot of these ideas could have worked, or will work, or might work. With motivation and persistence, I could get most of them to happen. The problem is with me, not with the ideas. Why can’t I just be happy with what I’ve got?

None of the ideas seems like THE ONE. I continue to believe that once I finally find the truth, the thing that works perfectly for me, the life’s purpose I was meant to do, everything will fall into place. I’ll be hit with a lightning bolt of clarity, and shout out “This is it! This is what my life is about!” Now that I’ve typed it out, it sounds like I’ve been watching too many movies.

The research that I’ve done on passion and life’s purpose and destiny tells me that it never happens like that. Nearly every time, you intend to do something, end up doing something else, and realize one day that you actually found your bliss a long time ago.

how do I accept myself enough to believe in one of these ideas?

I’m still working on that. I think the secret is that I just need to get off my ass and pick something. Work it until I figure out that it’s not the one, and then switch to something else. My biggest fear in using that method is that I’ll waste the next 40 years trying on hats that look great, but don’t quite fit just right.

I guess I’d better get busy.

It turns out, I AM a Wandering Generality, so it’s time for me to firm this blog up a bit, and become a Meaningful Specific. I’m smart, and very good looking, so there’s no reason why I can’t be very successful with my blog.

I’ve written about Google Wave, my charity mustache, interesting things I’ve seen in my day, Family Preparedness, Wulfgar’s Super Secret Oatmeal Recipe, Excel, Stories From My Yoot, and my 8 Favorite Tooters.

This is the part where YOU come in. And I need everyone’s help, all 6 of you. LOL!

Which of those posts did you like? Which of those subjects do you want to hear more about? Are there topics I haven’t covered, but you’re just dying to hear my opinion on?

PLEASE, tell me your answers in the comments to this post. Post anonymously if you want to. No subject or suggestion is too silly. Even if you’re not a subscriber, chime in anyway!

I’ll collect the answers, and then start moving in that direction.

Please help me!

Our megacorp masters at Google have seen fit to grant me a handful of invites to the currently-beta Google Wave preview.

Since the entire point of Google Wave is to collaborate with people you know, I thought the best way to accomplish that would be to put the invites up for grabs for my Facebook friends. That way, I have folks to wave with.

If you’re interested in an invite, please reply to the thread in my profile, and I’ll hand them out first come, first served.

A couple of caveats, though.

1. I will only give my invites to current Facebook friends. No friends of friends, or “this guy I know at work asked me to get one for him.”
2. Google Wave is still very much in beta. As such, the geek quotient for this app is enormous. If you don’t know what Google Wave is, you haven’t heard about it, or you can’t see why the idea is so flippin’ cool, you shouldn’t ask for an invite. You probably won’t use it, and that takes it away from someone who may.
3. I will answer requests ONLY from comments made to my Facebook status update found in my profile. The thread is plainly marked. Any other requests via this blog, or email, or anywhere else will be ignored.

I know these rules sound a little harsh for something that I received for free, but they’re necessary. The feeding frenzy surrounding Google Wave is at a fever pitch, and some folk are downright desperate. I’m trying to prevent a little bit of the insanity I’ve seen in other areas when Wave invites go up for grabs.