Because I haven’t found my niche/passion/thing/whatever yet, I don’t have a very focused agenda for using Twitter.  When I get my poop in a group, I’ll be a bit more focused, but right now, I’m just there for the lolz.

These Tooters bring the lolz.  They’re my absolute favorites, and you should check them out.

1.  @CcSteff-probably my all-time favorite Tooter.  Raunchy and sassy and geeky.  Gawds I love her.

• I don’t know how those guys got on the roof of the building next door, but now they know what my surpriseface looks like. Plus my tits.
• Celebrating Natl Day of Prayer by shitting all over religious beliefs. Because a bad idea is a bad idea no matter how old and dearly held.
• Niece pops up from behind a chair and says “Here I am.” Teaching her to follow it up with “Rock you like a hurricane.”

2.  @hotdogsladies-Merlin Mann of 43 Folders fame. His humor is often self-depracating, other times, it’s aimed at people doing dumb things.  Also, you feel smarter after reading Merlin for awhile.

• Joining a Facebook group about creative productivity is like buying a chair about jogging.
• Every time I pipe into a shell script without generating an error, I feel like a chimp who’s just learned he accidentally landed a jet.
• Whenever I consider studying C, mastering RegEx, or learning basic Cantonese, I remember that I still don’t know how water gets in my house.

3.  @phyllisstein-Describes himself as “UChicago student and old-guard queer running on gin and disdain.”  I love snarky humor, and phyllisstein is as snarky as it gets.

• “Sir, I believe I would like to use your wang for to pole-vault with.” I don’t flirt much.
• My University is preparing to quarantine students suspected of having swine flu and I have some suspiciously porcine bitches to turn in.
• On a train to the Chicago burbs. It looks like a Lane Bryant exploded in here.

4.  @mindykaling-The actress who played Kelly Kapoor on The Office.  Flippin’ hilarious.

• It’s like when you’re at the edge of the roof and you’re like: “I could just jump, it’d be so easy!” Bad, self-destructive Mindy!!
• too many spiders in my bed.
• ate handful of wasabi peas, then rubbed my eyes. fuuuuuuck.

5.  @badbanana-lots of business jokes about meetings and lunch.  Very droll and funny.

• He’s right, of course. @jordan327 says my previous post would have been funnier with “Paris Hilton’s Dignity”. So everyone block @jordan327.
• Madonna gets thrown by a horse and the next thing you know 21 polo ponies are killed at a match. Message received.
• Some men prefer Betty. Others, Wilma. Then there are those of us who keep eyeing all the huge dinosaur steaks.

6.  @redrabbit-sometimes crazy, sometimes spazzy.  Always a good read, and she’s trying to do puns.

• “Copywriting” I accomplished today: “Erica, is ‘goatfuck’ one word or two?”
• Consider this copy wrought.
• I wish Barack Obama were here. He’d know what to do.

7.  @phillygirl-every single one of her Toots makes me smile.

• Lady across the aisle copied down the item number of the talking lawn alligator from the SkyMall catalog like she’d found her golden fleece.
• Yeah, it has been a hectic morning, how did you…? Oh. That nacho just fell out of my shirt, didn’t it?
• When your dog is 80 lbs., giving her a bath is a full-contact sport. And now neither one of us has to worry about fleas & ticks for a while.

8.  @rainnwilson-The actor who played Dwight Schrute on The Office.  Very funny.

• I just don’t understand why my urine still tastes like wasabi!!!???!???
• Waitress: ‘Do u have any questions about the menu?’ Me: ‘What kind of font is this?’
• I told @sarahksilverman that she had nice ‘joobs’.

Who do you follow for the funny on Twitter?  Let’s hear ‘em!

This blog is still very wet behind the ears (as of the date of this post, anyway), so I thought I’d clarify a bit what it’s all about.

K, here goes…

The Chronicles of Wulfgarnia is an experimental blog that is being used as a means to discover what Wulfgar is passionate about.  It covers a broad range of topics that are pulled from his head, or found in his daily life.  As the blog matures, topics will be narrowed down using many subjective criteria, until a few clear interests stand out.  Although this goes counter to many accepted blogging practices, it’s a necessary process.

Wow, that sounds very wordy and dry.  Plus, it’s not long enough, nor does it give any benefit to the reader.  Let’s try again.

The Chronicles of Wulfgarnia is about my search for my life’s work. It’s about my search for my passion, and finding what it is I love to do. Problem is, I’ve been searching for my passion in life for many years. I have a wide range of interests and skills, but I can’t point to any one of them and say “That’s it! That’s what I was meant to do!” The Chronicles of Wulfgarnia begins with a very broad scope, and then continuously narrows and refines the focus, until I find what it is that drives me. I invite anyone who is still ambiguous about their passion to join me for the ride. I’d love to inspire or motivate others to find their passions along with me!

Now that’s better.  I think I’ll go with this.

Readers?  Please comment!